P5 English Composition model on the theme of ‘A wish that was fulfilled’

In the next few weeks the P5s will begin their SA2 writing. Some reminders for them will be to:

1. Make sure that the theme is used in the plot
2. Develop your character (s) and make sure that there are no more than 2 main characters
3. Check your tenses
4. Read your composition more than once to ensure that your sentence structures are clear
5. Check your punctuation, especially for dialogue

One of the compositions we have previously worked on with my P5s is ‘a wish that was fulfilled’.

While it does seem like an easy topic, a student can easily go off point so the planning stage for us was important in focusing and bringing the theme across. Also, I asked the students to create and develop an interesting character in this particular story. The model is from a student whom I felt was able to do both well 🙂

P5 English composition on the theme of A wish that was fulfilled

      “You’re such a scardey-cat!”  Jack started to imitate a chicken, flapping his “wings” just to annoy me.  “Exactly! You are just like a chicken! Do you really think that you can do this?”  George exclaimed.  The two of them burst out laughing, high-fiving each other as hard as possible. 

            I clenched my fist.  George and Jack were the two biggest bullies in school.  Since I was scared of many things, I was the victim they loved to pick on the most.  However, they were as big as giants and looked really beefy.  I did not want to take any chances of getting injured severely by defending myself.  Therefore, I tried to ignore all the insults they were throwing at me. As rage continued burning on inside me, I forced myself to just turn around and walk away.  I could no longer tolerate any of this.  I had always had a wish to overcome my many fears. The one fear that I had always wanted to overcome was stage fright. Despite having the overwhelming desire to achieve my wish I know that for someone like me, this was almost impossible.  This time, I had to prove George and Jack wrong, and the only way to do that was to fulfil my wish.

              “The school will be hosting an annual story-telling session.  If anyone is interested in being the storyteller, please raise your hand now,” my form teacher briefly explained.  I widened my eyes in awe.  This was it!  This was my chance to prove to everyone that I was not a coward.  I raised my hand immediately, with great enthusiasm.  Upon seeing this, the entire class burst out laughing, even my form teacher was no exception.  The excited expression on my face slowly disappeared only to become an embarrassed one.  My face turned as red as a tomato.  “How can a coward join a storytelling contest? George continued to taunt me. Despite being looked down on, the determination in my heart continued to flare on.  My teacher then scribbled my name down on a piece of paper and told me the date of the storytelling session.

            For the next one week, I spent countless hours choosing the best stories there were and reading them out loud.  Every once in a while, I would get a few of my relative together just so they could hear me story tell.  After long hours of rehearsal, I was prepared.  I was confident in proving that I was able to overcome my fear. After a few days of waiting in anticipation, the big day finally arrived.  It was finally my time to shine.  I was in the backstage waiting for my turn to tell my story.

     After what felt like an eternity, the girl before me finally wrapped up her story.  A thunderous applause could be heard as the girl bowed and skipped to the backstage.  ‘Good luck” she said to me cheerfully.  I knew I was going to need it.  There was a lot more people than I thought there would be.

“Time for our next storyteller!  Please welcome to the stage… Max Lee!” 

            Upon hearing that, I waddled onto the stage.  Once I took a quick glance at the audience, I could hear my heart pounding against my ribcage.  There were at least one hundred pairs of eyes all looking at me in the hall!  My eyes widened in horror.  My lips parted but no words came out.  As I stood still, I could see right behind the microphone located in front on me, that all the audience yelling at me to hurry up.  I even saw Jack and George jeering at me.  Just as I was about to give up and walk off the stage, I remembered the struggle that had led to this moment.  There was no way I could let all my effort go to waste.  Suddenly, everything seemed to come back to my mind.  I grabbed the microphone confidently and without delay, I started to tell my story both fluently and expressively. Awed by my talent, the audience gave me a standing ovation.  Even the jaws of Jack and George dropped.

            Finally, I had managed to overcome my fear and most importantly, my wish had finally been fulfilled. That day, I learnt all about perseverance and how to face challenges head on. I knew that I would be able to fulfil any wish that would come my way from then on.