Last week, I posted about our P4 student scoring well for her end-of-the-year composition.
Today, I would like to congratulate my P5 student, C, on scoring 36/40 for her English SA2 composition & full marks for her SW! Her theme was a straightforward and rather common one – honesty. However, the easier themes are sometimes harder to score as most students would write similar plots.
What makes a good composition stand out from the rest?
1. Theme development
Theme development is emphasised in all our classes, including our lower primary English classes. As students reach the P5 & P6 levels, writing out of point can be a painful lesson. So, to help our students avoid making this mistake, we give them ways that they can mention the theme fluidly in their compositions. In C’s composition below, she mentions the theme at the start of the story when the protagonist asks her sister what does the proverb ‘honesty is the best policy’ really means. She also mentions the theme in the dialogue between the sisters and in the concluding paragraph. C has developed her theme fluidly and clearly.
C has developed two interesting main characters in her story – the protagonist and her sister. The protagonist learns a ‘real life’ lesson on what honesty means. She starts off as a dishonest character but then realises her mistake with her sister’s help. By the end of the story, the protagonist has learnt her lesson and become an honest person. C’s characters are relatable and their sibling interaction is realistic.
There were just a few grammatical mistakes in her composition. Tenses were spot on except for one past perfect tense mistake and there was one spelling mistake in her composition. To score above 35 marks for composition in P5 & P6, writing a composition with few grammar mistakes is important.
With the above points in mind, please take a look at C’s composition. She has kindly allowed us to use her composition as a model on the blog. Congratulations once again to C!
Model Composition on the theme of ‘An act of honesty’
An act of honesty
A broken television set, a wallet, a child holding up a sign with the word ‘Sorry’ on it.
“Tuition is finally over!” I exclaimed.
My sister, Chloe, and I were walking home after our tuition lesson and chatting happily.
“Do you know what the phrase ‘honesty is the best policy’ means?” I asked, “I need to write a composition with that phrase as a title,” I continued.
As Chloe was explaining the meaning of the phrase, we walked past a deserted park. Just then, something caught our eyes. There was a wallet lying on the ground! We ran towards the wallet at a speed that would shame a cheetah. I picked up the black wallet and found that it was a Gucci wallet. Chloe then rudely snatched the wallet from me and opened it. We were shocked to see many $10 notes packed tightly in it. There was also an identification card which had the name ‘Zhong Chao Li’ on it and some credit cards.
I can take the wallet and buy the newest game I have been wanting! I thought, flashing a grin. Chloe read my mind and snatched the wallet from me.
“Do not think about it. We are returning it!” she snapped at me.
We had a heated argument but I gave in not long after when Chloe reminded me that my parents would be very disappointed in me if I was dishonest and kept the money to buy the game that I wanted.
“I can promise you that you will not feel good if you take the money,” Chloe said, shaking her head.
I hung my head in shame and finally agreed to return the wallet. We looked around but there was no one in sight. Hence, we decided to head to the nearest police station and we handed the wallet back to a police officer. We told him where we had found it. Right at that exact moment, a lady rushed in and told the police officer that she had lost a black Gucci wallet. Upon hearing that, the police officer asked her for her name.
“Zhang Xiao Li,” she replied anxiously.
The officer then handed her the black Gucci wallet and asked her to check if everything was intact. She showered us with words of gratitude and offered to give us some money. I politely declined her offer. Chloe was glad to see that I had changed.
When we reached home, Chloe and I immediately told our parents about the incident that had happened. They praised us for being honest and agreed to buy the newest game for us.
‘Honesty is the best policy’. I finally understood the meaning of this phrase and was glad that I had done an act of honesty that day.
Check the other articles from this section
- Phrases to create suspense & Model Composition – Upper primary English
- Tips on preparing Primary 5 students for their PSLE year in Term 4 and model composition being late
- P5 Weighted Assessment Model Compo: Being Responsible
- 5 Situational Writing tips for P5 students
- P5 English Composition Writing: 4 ways to develop the theme when planning in composition writing & A Punishment model
- P5 Paper 1 Reminders for SA2 & Prelim composition model
- P5 Characterisation technique & Weighted Assessment Composition – A Competition
- Tips on how to improve your P5 composition writing
- P5 English Paper 1 Reminders & Model Composition – A new friend
- Three ways to score for your P5 composition & a model on A Surprise
- 3 simple writing techniques to make your P5 composition sparkle
- P5 Model Compositions & How we can make the most out of them
- P5 English Composition Encouraging Someone
- P5 English Composition An Act of Honesty
- English Composition an Unwelcomed Guest P5
- Compiled List of SA1 Composition Topics 2016
- 2016 List of SA2 Composition Topics P5
- Primary 5 Composition A Dangerous Situation
- Comparison of P5 and P6 Composition Writing & How we can help to bridge that gap
- Primary 5 Composition An Adventure & descriptive writing
- How to teach Composition Writing?
- P5 / P6 Composition model A good deed
- Narrative Writing P5 / P6
- How to plan a composition plot? P5
- Words and Phrases for different writing scenarios
- Creative writing & the use of Idioms
- PSLE English Composition model on the theme of ‘A Mishap’
- English Composition An Argument P5 & P6
- Primary 5 Composition Theme A Fun Day
- Primary 5 Composition Theme Cooking
- English composition Happiness model
- Phrases to create suspense – P5 / P6 Composition Writing
- Compositions Settings
- P5 English Composition model on the theme of ‘A wish that was fulfilled’
- Primary 5 English Comprehension Open-ended
- 4 tips to manage composition themes well – P5
- P5 English Composition Protagonist vs Antagonist
- P5 English Composition A Bad Decision
- P5 Composition A Celebration Gone Wrong
- P5 English Composition : How to score for Paper 1 and model on Trusting Someone
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